What About Holiday Days?

I am reading all these postings for teaching jobs in Korea and notice that the number of sick days allowed is rarely mentioned. Why is that? From what I heard, teachers often get sick soon after their arrival to Korea...sometimes very sick. Mentioning sick days when advertising the contract details would be a huge selling point for me. What happens when one exceeds their sick days and is still sick? So confusing.

I am a walking disaster when it comes to travelling. I always get a sick stomach and a cold almost instantly upon arrival in a foreign country. It's the good ol' Canadian cleanliness, I think. Plus, I grew up eating the typical "meat and potatoes" diet, without any spices except for salt and pepper. 

International Marriage vs Mental and Financial Health

I would be lying if I said it didn't cross my mind that my Korean guy is especially interested in me as I may be "the ticket" out of Korea. He has voiced his disappointment with the Korean system many times, even prior to meeting him in his emails. When I met him, I heard laundry lists of how his morals, viewpoints and aspirations aren't being met in Korea, despite his love for his country. He is a one of those political types where laws, policy making and where the powers fall short are his favorite thing to rant about. I do not follow politics and have a hard time understanding how one can lose sleep over something I can't directly control.

When it comes to marriage for Canadians, how can they trust people that they marry overseas? When the couple comes back to Canada, the foreign bride/groom is "home free" and automatically given Canadian status where the Canadian spouse is financially responsible for the person for 3 years, even if the marriage doesn't last a day in Canada. I've seen it...I live in a big city. I have a friend who married to leave her country and come to Canada then divorced weeks afterward. I also have a friend who married someone overseas, brought her to Canada and just now was presented with a $23 K bill from the government for the 3 years she tallied up on being on social assistance after divorcing him.

There's no guarantee that any marriage will last. But thinking about the risks of marrying overseas, it's huge.
I admit that Canada is awesome, and I can completely understand how people in another country that was overcrowded and lacked social services would likely look to get out through marriage...it way be the only way out. But what about us starry eyed Canadians, who on the most part and friendly and straight forward, trusting and "nice"? Are we destined to be screwed over...have the wool pulled over our eyes by a sexy, foreign stranger who is business savvy(especially in Korea, where working unfathomable hours are a way of survival),willing and able to "play the part" and pretend that we are the only one for them? Sure, true love happens...I'm not a total pessimist. I just wonder how the hell are we suppose to know what is "true love and destiny" and what is just really great acting? Someone "in love" is in an altered mental state and can be fooled sooo easily...

Stay Alive by Yoon Band

Holy, that's a great track...from the YB vs RRM mini-album, which I believe was just released last month(?). Yoon Band's lead singer(Yoon Do Hyun) is unbelievable. ...he can sing ballads and has the power to deliver strong angst when needed. His voice is sweet, tone perfect yet powerful. "Stay Alive" does have a lot of U2ish element but yet remains distinctly different.

Compare the studio version to the live version on u-Tube...they are both un-frickin' believable(I put them up on the blog on the u-tube channel indicator, so you can just click there, at least when it's working).
Yoon Band's singer's English pronuciation is right on target plus he can pull it off live. There are few vocalists who can do this.

Watching the live video makes me chuckle...I was expecting to see the image of a typical North American rock  fan in leather, black t-shirts, the "hair" and billows of smoke from people smokin' weed, ink work everywhere but instead, there are thousands of orderly, multi-coloured glow sticks. I could just imagine owners of those glow sticks were thousands of fashionably and well dressed girls, in high-collared shirts(don't show them boobies), mini-skirts and "respectable" heeled shoes...I am sure there weren't any sterotypical "rocker" chicks in that crowd.

In the live video clip, I love Yoon Do Hyun's new hair cut...very sexy...he has all the right moves...no awkward moments! Plus the video shows the drummer ,Kim Jin Won,  who I just drool over everytime I see the band's photo...please excuse the volumous puddles of liquid flowing out of the computer...it's just my saliva...

Fighting leads to defending K-Pop?

I have had a number of email fights with my Korean guy. An email fight with someone who speaks English is uncomfortable enough but when you add someone who translates almost every English sentence through an electronic translator, you've got real trouble and confusion for both parties.
So far, we have had 2 blow outs. I am waiting for the 3rd any day now in response to my last email.

I would have to say, the most obvious quality in my guy's fight email is fire! He is angry and very hot tempered. And yes, his attitude does prove to be true to the "angry Korean male" sterotype. Unlike a disagreement with a fellow Canadian who would just concentrate on the topic he would bring in his nationalistic pride and his IQ into the picture. Who would involve these 2 irrelivent points into a disagreement that has nothing to do with either topic?
Here's a few classics:

'Do you think that you know(have) knowledges or common senses about all around the world more than me?'

'In Korea, we enter the college(university) over 90% students after the graduate high school.
Korean elementary school children study until 10 p.m. and Korean High school students study at their school until 12 a.m.Do you know why?We do to win others, to survive in the keen competition world.
We study to win Japan, to win America. Have you ever study to survive?But we do.'


'Do you know why Korean B-Boy dance team always win a No.1 prize at the World's dance contest?

Because they dance risk their life.
( I saw that what they said on the newspaper, "We dance risk our life, so we can victory".)'

See what I mean? The issue will never get solved. There is never an apology. There is always an inclusion of this statement ,
"And now, I don't trust you any more."
This one appears so much, I swear it's cut and pasted into the fight email.

So the lesson that I have learned is to pick and choose my battles with him. There are some things that can't be expressed very well through emails. Many things are better discussed face to face to get the other facial expressions involved....as well as having an English Korean dictionary handy and a lot of paper to write/ reword the topic so he really understands what we're talking about.

To Trust or Not to Trust?

When I was in Seoul, I hooked up with a guy that I met online. We had been emailing back and forth for some time, and the emails were pretty normal...things about everyday life, common interests, . There wasn't any talk about sex, or money or nothing. He just seemed like a thinker, well educated, compassionate...I know, he could have been acting, I know! I said it like it is...I don't have anything and am an unemployed student. Was it risky to actually meet someone I have never met before in a strange country? Absolutely. I really listened to my gut prior to doing so, not that my gut would help if I got in trouble. It just SEEMED like the right thing to do at the time. Have you ever had that feeling to do something outside your comfort zone? Not that I am superficial, but his picture was SOO HANDSOME...which was one of the main deciding factors of meeting him. He was the best looking guy that I have seen online, ever!

Luckily, things turned out better than I could have ever imagined. He was kind, smart, normal...but a bit shorter than he said in his email(not that it mattered so much to me, because shorter guys are OK for me).
I discovered that his English was not anything like his emails, which always presented pretty flawless English. He did mention that he uses a translator to understand the full content of my emails but I had no idea that he really didn't understand that much English. I think he understood maybe 30% of what I said to him during the visit...which did cause more than a few misunderstanding.

As time has gone on with distance now separating us and multitudes of emails were exchanged, I wonder if trust should given to him or not. Lately, I have been thinking a bit more cautiously. Sure, he fires out the "I love yous" and all the nicety-nice things that girls love to hear via email, but there's some big holes. Huge holes that I can see now that time has exposed.
     For example, I was thinking about how I saw a picture of a baby on his keychain and a ring around his neck. I recently had a chat with a Korean guy here in Toronto through a friend, and his "ring around his neck" was his wedding ring. But strangely, my guy gave the ring around his neck to me...he said he "found it"?  When I saw the baby picture on my guy's keychain, he said it was his nephew. I later asked how old his nephew was, and he said he was 8? Very confusing...was the keychain not his, meaning that the car wasn't his and maybe his relatives or does that mean that he has a baby that he hasn't told me about? He did say that he really loves his nephew...plus, when people have kids pictures, they give these pics to everyone they know(those packages give way too many pictures). He swore that he was single. How can I know? Why was is that when he got a phone call when we were together, he had to take it privately...I have no idea what he's saying in Korean, so why wou ld it matter? And the latest event that I have analyzed to death is why he doesn't answer my phone calls. I didn't usually call him, but lately had been dying to hear his voice. I called, answering machine. I called a dozen occassions later and no answer...ringing and ringing. I have a phone card so it's cheap and no big deal. I emailed him and asked him on at least 5 occasions WHEN I could call so he can pick it up...no answer. On the last email, he said that he cancelled his phone some time ago and doesn't have another one yet. And get this, he said his reason for cancelling is because I don't call him...???? Yes, giant RED FLAG. Hmm, maybe he could have mentioned that he cancelled is phone when he cancelled it. Was this email an error in English...is he getting bolder and not using his translator?

Anyway, putting all this together, it really looks like he's a married guy with a kid. Truth hurts, but how can I really know? Actions speak louder than words, right?

Just go and teach already!

Over the years, there has been a number of things that have held me back from teaching in Korea. As a fresh grad, I was ready, willing and stoked about going.
I married young and was married at that time. Things weren't going that well with the relationship. At that time, I thought that it's better to stay in town and I'd decline the offer. Don't get me wrong, I still had support from my spouse at the time, but hesitant support. I was soo scared of the unknown. Scared of what I'd lose, not thinking of what I could gain. I had not travelled on my own at that time and could only think of the bad things...fear of the "what ifs". I wasn't raised with the most optimistic parents and my Dad was very parinoid. Unfortunately, I take after my Dad in that respect.

The next time I had the urge to teach overseas, I applied to Nova in Japan. I was super hyped and well on my way with my Visa process. I even went to school with one of the head teachers there and wouldn't be alone. I was heavily involved with another guy at the time, who was also very supportive. My excuse this time was that I didn't have the funds required, as they wanted the teacher to have $1500 in pocket before going. My guy said he would lend me the money too. Again, when it was time to make final arrangements, I declined, even after sending over my contract to Japan with my diploma. The problem again was that I was "IN LOVE" , worrying about the future and the possible collapse of my so "in love" relationship, unsure of what the other side of the work would hold AGAIN. In retrospect, I really can't believe that I didn't go to that one.

My lasted round of "wanting to go and teach" started last year. I wanted to do something with myself that would make a difference to others. I love children and wanted to work with them. Again, I ran into recruiters with contracts that were extremely unclear. I would ask the recruiter to clarify a point, and then I never receive a reply. I must have given the impression that I was " a troublemaker" to them, where in reality, I just wanted clarification. The next recruiters, 2 of them, lost interest in me when they found out that I had kids. My last attempt was just last month, but then life got in the way when one of my parents almost died of a GI emergency. Strangely, after that event, I found out that the school was on a few blacklists. Is it just a coincidence that such an emergency occurred at just the exact time that I was going to mail out my Visa documents? Uncanny, isn't it.
In regards to my a life threatening illness, what if I had to fly back for a funeral? I have read some horror stories in blogs from teachers about schools not allowing the teacher to leave the school to attend their own parent's funeral! How crueul is that! How could they continue to teach at the school without that major blow affecting their performance and attitude toward the management?

So, in summary, the main reasons that haven't been able to get to Korea to teach is because of a) being "IN LOVE"...guys, that seems to be my, and a lot of other girls' "raison d'etre" b) fear of the unknown c)having kids and being a burden to potential employers d)wanting to know full information regarding the contract with the school, which seems to be impossible for the recruiters to get answers for...plus, I am sure they have many, many other potential teachers who will sign the contract without question(so why spend extra time with my file) and lastely d)life' unpredictable circumstances that can happen to anyone at anytime.

Japanese Eye Candy

There's something about a guy who puts a lot of effort into themselves...nice look, colonge, effort on hair, effort on dress and confidence. Wow. Not that I don't enjoy the "natural" /the rough and rugged look. I like to look at great looking guys.
But I am picky...most of what I find "good looking" lately has been East Asian guys.

I just about lost my mind when I learned about Japan's Hosts Clubs and immediately got a hold of the CD "The Great Happiness Space". The movie was a sociologist real look at what the Host club world is all about which went behind the scences to show the real emotions of the staff and the clients. It was really a great documentary and eye opening documentary.

So now, when I drool over the pictures on the website posting the glamour shots of the Japanese hosts advertising their wares(http://www.host2.jp/closeup/index.html), I can now think twice about their exterior beauty and can see beyond it and imagine that behind the beauty, there is pain.